Are You Busy God?

Are you busy God? Cause I have a few questions if you have the time.

Like why did you have to take my beautiful, charismatic daughter Courtney so early? Why did you let her addiction to alcohol be stronger than her will to live? Why didn’t she listen to the doctor or the rest of us?

I Know she tried and tried and struggled and struggled. As I read some things she wrote, I can tell she was very sad inside, she knew she had a problem. She would have given anything to get better, but could never get the monkey off her back completely. There are people I want to blame, I feel if they had treated her differently, she would still be here.

I don’t think she knew she would die. I know she knew she was very sick. It scared her. She had slipped up. why did this slip up put her over the edge? Were you too busy God to see how she was drowning? Or is this the way you saved her?

Are you busy God, cause I need answers. The pain I feel is physically debilitating. I can’t believe it’s true. I cannot believe I will never talk with her again. Never hear her laugh. Never hear her call me mom. Now no one calls me mom now.

God do you see her? Have you met her? If you have, you would not forget her! She is memorable with her large personality, infectious laugh and a great beauty inside and out.

Are you busy God? If you could take a moment and please tell her I miss her. That I am heartbroken, but I am not mad at her. Please tell her I love her and always have. That I feel I should have done more, but I believe she knew how hard I tried to help her beat the addiction too.

God, I know your busy, There is so much tragedy that happens every day. It must be hard to take care of everyone. But please know how much I would appreciate it if you took a moment and let my little girl know that she is special. That everyone loves her and misses her. That she made a difference in so many lives. That her Mom loves her to the moon and back. Forever!

Thanking you in advance. If you are not too busy God.

Written By:

Patricia Brusha

“Mom”

 

In memory of Courtney Elizabeth Michaels

January 7, 1991 – June 4, 2019

  1. Suzanne 09/06/2019 at 8:22 pm - Reply

    God, I know you’re busy. I also know you have a huge army of angels up there to help you out. I also know how hard these angels work.
    If you can, God, please ease some of Patricia’s pain. If you can, wrap her in your arms and tell her you love her. Please let her know that Courtney’s soul is at peace and that she’s watching over her mom every single second of every single day.
    God, I know you work hard… I reach out to you often and I can imagine there are millions of people who also love you and ask for strength every day. If you can, please look out for my friend. Patricia has always been independent and her strength is enormous. But, God, she needs you now. I need you to take care of her.
    Thank you, God. I know that I can count on you…
    Love,
    Suzanne

    • plbrusha 09/07/2019 at 8:08 am - Reply

      Thanks Suzanne for the wonderful response, she writes with tears streaming, I love you

  2. Christie Brusha 09/06/2019 at 9:54 pm - Reply

    I became her father, loved her as my own, taught her to be strong, helped her love and live, and now will have to miss her dearly. At these times I will never understand the why. My heart is broken. Her Father Big D

  3. Kathi 09/07/2019 at 2:36 pm - Reply

    Just, I love you both. I wish I could take away the pain.

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